Goodbye's Never The End
by Allons-yEveryone
Summary: Watson's leaving, but before he goes he has something to tell Holmes.


**Goodbye's Never The End**

**Rating:** T  
><strong>Genre:<strong> Hurt/Comfort  
><strong>Summary: <strong>Watson's leaving but before he goes he has something to tell Holmes.  
><strong>Author Note:<strong> I did this really quickly so it's really bad. Excuse spelling mistakes stupid four year old cousin wouldn't leave me alone.

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><p>I walked in and sat in my armchair, the last time I would probably. All my things were packed, Mary had left in the first hansom and I'd leave in the second. Holmes was walking around the room unbuttoning the belts he'd used to conduct his experiment of Blackwoods 'Cheating Death' act. The brilliant and stupid mind that he was he decided to do it, lucky thing it worked.<br>I coughed, "Well," What had I been meaning to say…? "Thanks for the ring, Mary loves it."

Holmes did not turn. He beside our work table, facing away from me, his arms around his back trying to undo the belt there. I stood, leaning on my cane and walked up to him.  
>"I'm going to miss this place," I said, and you…<br>I pushed his hands away and began undoing the belt myself, "You better not get into any mischief while I'm gone," I chuckled.  
>"Hmm, well I'll try not to but without my dear Watson that might be a bit hard," Holmes voice was hollow; he really was going to miss me.<p>

I bit my lip, he didn't know because I never told him…It wasn't natural, it went against what I was taught, what the church said, what everyone expected. But no matter how wrong it made me feel, I really did love Holmes. I would never want anything to come between us, to break us apart…Not even a marriage. I wanted to be by his side now, tomorrow and yesterday. But marriage was the only option, I had a reputation and living with a man for god knows how long had started rumours. I couldn't let that damage Holmes' or my practise.

I knew Holmes loved me back, but I wasn't sure how much that love went. He was stupid and annoying and the most unagreeable when living with. He was unhealthy and searched for danger continuously. I was afraid that if I left him then something dreadful would happen. But the whole point of this marriage was that I would be closer to him than ever before. Yes it sounded ridiculously complicated, nevertheless it was the kind of plan Holmes liked.

I stepped closer, putting my arms further around him than necessary so that I could remove the belt, "Do you know how she and I met?" I asked.  
>Holmes did not answer, he must know he was being so obvious, surely?<br>"She was invited by my brother to a family dining," I turned away from Holmes and continued, let's see if he was a smart as I knew he was, "four other woman accompanied her, my brother's discreet way of saying, please find someone and marry."

I took my hat off and threw it down onto the chair, "I met all of them, most were bright and wonderful woman." I chuckled, "But Mary was the kindest, the kindest and most innocent of all of them, when I told her I was a doctor she had thought I only dealt with colds and flews and made little remedies to banish sickness." I laughed harder, "I had to explain to her that I was someone who dealt with everything, death, birth and illness."

"She asked me if I'd been in England long and I told her I was in the afghan war but was sent back because I was shot," I turned back to Holmes, "She asked me if the place I spoke of was in England."  
>Holmes still stood facing the other way still, but he was listening intently.<br>"I thought she was pretty, pretty and sweet but very very dense," I smiled, "I chose to marry her because of that."

"I, I don't understand," Holmes' voice was slightly croaky and confused.  
>"She'd never suspect that I did not love her," I said, "She'd never expect me to love…you."<br>Holmes went ridged and I wasn't sure if I'd done the right thing for a minute, maybe he didn't feel the same way, maybe I'd miss deduced his feelings. I knew I was still nowhere near his great powers of deduction, but I thought…  
>I reached out as his shoulders began to shake, "Holmes?" I asked concerned.<br>I rested a hand on his shoulder and he turned, I gasped as I saw the tears streaming down his face.  
>"You're marrying her because she won't suspect that you love me," Holmes repeated.<br>"Yes," I said, smiling.

"I thought, I thought you were just going to leave and…" he sniffed, "I thought that it was stupid that I loved you…"  
>I stepped forward and brought my hands to rest on both his shoulders, I lent my forehead against his, "You fool, I've always loved you."<br>"My dear Watson," a smile began to appear on his face.  
>I brought my hand to his cheek and brushed a tear from his skin, "People were getting suspicious, I thought if I wanted you I was going to have to do something about it."<p>

Holmes chuckled and I lent in pressing my lips against his, it was short and sweet but it was better than I'd dreamed, "I love you," Holmes said.  
>"I love you too," I grinned.<p>

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><p><strong>Really bad, really quick...sorry...<strong>

**Excuse the crapness...my little four year old cousin wouldn't stop annoying me and I was craving to write Sherlock Holmes fanfiction...so this happened...**

**Please review!**


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